Devil's Food

Last week I embarked on a “clean eating” plan. Eat no processed food. Eat from the earth. If man created it, do not eat it. In theory, it was a good idea, and great for my health. And I was able to do it for three days, until someone at work shoved a chocolate covered donut down my throat.

Okay, so she didn’t shove it down my throat. But she did pick up the Entenmanns’s box from the food table I had managed to avoid all day, carry it to my desk during the three o’clock danger hour, and hold the box of glossy-chocolate sugary-smelling orbs in front of my face. That’s equivalent to holding a gun to my head and making me eat it. That’s even worse than the devilish serpent offering me fruit from the forbidden tree - because at least eating from the tree of forbidden fruit would have been “eating clean”.

There’s food everywhere. How do you escape it? I just now found out Entenmann’s is even in my spellchecker. I had it spelled wrong. How do brand names of processed food products end up in Microsoft’s spellchecker? Food is everywhere. You cannot escape it.

So I have decided to still eat clean - at least 75% of the time. That is practical. That is doable. At least I think it is.

High-tech tomatoes. Mysterious milk. Supersquash. Are we supposed to eat this stuff? Or is it going to eat us? ~Annita Manning